Shifting my clarities (opheliablue) wrote,
Shifting my clarities

Rant before bed - it really helps me sleep! Highly recommended

Oh, the joy of sometimes:

"I have been thinking about Assia Wevill and her last actions on this earth, which were even worse than stealing a woman's husband. It seems that Ted was ready to make some move like this by then - Assia was merely convenient. And for Assia to sit in Sylvia's house, eating her food, drinking her wine, forcing her to engage in some strained hospitality - it is too awful, but I'm sure more common than ever aired in polite circles.

What is hardest for me to live with is Assia's killing of her little girl Shura. I despise her for taking that little girl to hell with her - there is no excuse for it. I wish Shura could have lived. I wish Assia would have thought, "I have done enough damage - I will leave my child alone". But it was not to be. Where ever Shura is now, may she have peace, may she have a new life filled with love and the protection of loving beings, may she be far away from her deranged killer. God and Goddess bless and protect her forever."

If I wasn't a scaredy cat I would say to that:

You are *so* right. Ted was at the 'right point' to have an affair - I imagine Assia was 'convenient' (as well as being beautiful and intriguing to him, but we don't talk about that.) If it was down to him being at the 'right point,' I am not quite sure why you refer to her as "stealing a woman's husband" but nevermind, it's not important.

Yes, the gall of the woman! Imagine actually going and sitting in Sylvia's house, at Sylvia's invitation, eating and drinking Sylvia's wine and food, at Sylvia's invitation - and worst of all, forcing Sylvia to engage in hospitality with her! What was the woman thinking of? You don't accept a dinner invitation and then eat dinner and talk to the hostess. Jesus. What a bitch! I find it almost unbelievable that she wasn't polite enough to arrive there and announce that she intended to steal Ted Hughes away and therefore she would not be eating or drinking or engaging in hospitality.

"What is hardest for me to live with is Assia's killing of her little girl Shura... [it may be a minor difference, but certain words can change things a helluva lot - she did *not* actively *kill* Shura. I'm sorry, I realise that she turned on the oven and lay down on a mattress with Shura and they both died, but you are only using the word 'killing' to create an impression of some mad woman stabbing her daughter to death first then killing herself] I despise her for taking that little girl to hell with her - there is no excuse for it." - I am terribly sorry for you that you have to live with this. I know you didn't know either of them or have anything to do with them, but I understand it must be a terribly traumatic event in your life. I expect you will need some therapy to deal with it. I hope that the comforting thought of Assia burning in hell forever will make you feel better, though.

I am sure that Assia did not realize that you would feel this way about it. I am convinced that, had she realized, of course she would not have let Shura die with her. If only you had been there to tell Assia what she should be thinking - it could all have been so different.

I make no comment on what Assia 'did' in relation to Shura, except to say that indeed, she should have thought of 'leaving her alone.' There is no excuse for that - I do not care that she was about to commit suicide herself and that that usually means that people are not thinking entirely in the same way they would 'normally.'

I am sure that Assia woke up that morning, decided to kill herself and then thought "oh I'll kill Shura as well, just for the heck of it." It is rather ironic that you say you wish Assia had thought of 'leaving her alone' when in fact that is [probably] partly the reason she did take Shura with her. Again, I make no comment on the 'rightness' or 'wrongness' of this - I don't think it's possible to look at the actions of someone about to kill themselves in terms of right and wrong. It is, however, the case that she knew very well that Ted Hughes was not particularly interested in Shura - his 'guilt' about Sylvia's death made him concentrate very much on the two children they had. Assia saw Ted, time and time again, ignore Shura and only pay attention to Frieda & Nick. She was well aware that he had not wanted her to have a baby. She was also well aware that he had already moved on to another serious relationship. She was isolated, depressed, alone - perhaps she (in her state of mind at the time) felt 'frightened' of what might happen to Shura if she were left behind. No I am not saying that 'excuses' it. I don't think 'excusing it' comes into it. It may have been partly what was in her mind at the time, though.

Finally - and I'm not sure how to say this politely - your last two sentences are quite the most stupid thing I've ever read. I hope you get some help (I mean for your own sake now, not to talk about how you can't live with what Assia Wevill did.)
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