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Oh, the joy of http://www.sylviaplathforum.com sometimes:

"I have been thinking about Assia Wevill and her last actions on this earth, which were even worse than stealing a woman's husband. It seems that Ted was ready to make some move like this by then - Assia was merely convenient. And for Assia to sit in Sylvia's house, eating her food, drinking her wine, forcing her to engage in some strained hospitality - it is too awful, but I'm sure more common than ever aired in polite circles.

What is hardest for me to live with is Assia's killing of her little girl Shura. I despise her for taking that little girl to hell with her - there is no excuse for it. I wish Shura could have lived. I wish Assia would have thought, "I have done enough damage - I will leave my child alone". But it was not to be. Where ever Shura is now, may she have peace, may she have a new life filled with love and the protection of loving beings, may she be far away from her deranged killer. God and Goddess bless and protect her forever."


If I wasn't a scaredy cat I would say to that:

You are *so* right. Ted was at the 'right point' to have an affair - I imagine Assia was 'convenient' (as well as being beautiful and intriguing to him, but we don't talk about that.) If it was down to him being at the 'right point,' I am not quite sure why you refer to her as "stealing a woman's husband" but nevermind, it's not important.

Yes, the gall of the woman! Imagine actually going and sitting in Sylvia's house, at Sylvia's invitation, eating and drinking Sylvia's wine and food, at Sylvia's invitation - and worst of all, forcing Sylvia to engage in hospitality with her! What was the woman thinking of? You don't accept a dinner invitation and then eat dinner and talk to the hostess. Jesus. What a bitch! I find it almost unbelievable that she wasn't polite enough to arrive there and announce that she intended to steal Ted Hughes away and therefore she would not be eating or drinking or engaging in hospitality.

"What is hardest for me to live with is Assia's killing of her little girl Shura... [it may be a minor difference, but certain words can change things a helluva lot - she did *not* actively *kill* Shura. I'm sorry, I realise that she turned on the oven and lay down on a mattress with Shura and they both died, but you are only using the word 'killing' to create an impression of some mad woman stabbing her daughter to death first then killing herself] I despise her for taking that little girl to hell with her - there is no excuse for it." - I am terribly sorry for you that you have to live with this. I know you didn't know either of them or have anything to do with them, but I understand it must be a terribly traumatic event in your life. I expect you will need some therapy to deal with it. I hope that the comforting thought of Assia burning in hell forever will make you feel better, though.

I am sure that Assia did not realize that you would feel this way about it. I am convinced that, had she realized, of course she would not have let Shura die with her. If only you had been there to tell Assia what she should be thinking - it could all have been so different.

I make no comment on what Assia 'did' in relation to Shura, except to say that indeed, she should have thought of 'leaving her alone.' There is no excuse for that - I do not care that she was about to commit suicide herself and that that usually means that people are not thinking entirely in the same way they would 'normally.'

I am sure that Assia woke up that morning, decided to kill herself and then thought "oh I'll kill Shura as well, just for the heck of it." It is rather ironic that you say you wish Assia had thought of 'leaving her alone' when in fact that is [probably] partly the reason she did take Shura with her. Again, I make no comment on the 'rightness' or 'wrongness' of this - I don't think it's possible to look at the actions of someone about to kill themselves in terms of right and wrong. It is, however, the case that she knew very well that Ted Hughes was not particularly interested in Shura - his 'guilt' about Sylvia's death made him concentrate very much on the two children they had. Assia saw Ted, time and time again, ignore Shura and only pay attention to Frieda & Nick. She was well aware that he had not wanted her to have a baby. She was also well aware that he had already moved on to another serious relationship. She was isolated, depressed, alone - perhaps she (in her state of mind at the time) felt 'frightened' of what might happen to Shura if she were left behind. No I am not saying that 'excuses' it. I don't think 'excusing it' comes into it. It may have been partly what was in her mind at the time, though.

Finally - and I'm not sure how to say this politely - your last two sentences are quite the most stupid thing I've ever read. I hope you get some help (I mean for your own sake now, not to talk about how you can't live with what Assia Wevill did.)

Comments

( 11 comments — Leave a comment )
just_breathe149
Jul. 16th, 2005 04:22 pm (UTC)
You know what really annoys me about the end of that? That they say "God and Goddess bless"...because earlier they refer to Assia taking her daughter to "hell" with her...but thats a very Wiccan ending and true Wiccans don't believe in there being a hell/devil/etc...I don't know why that bugs me, but it does, lol.
opheliablue
Jul. 16th, 2005 04:26 pm (UTC)
Funny (funny ironic, not funny haha) - I was just thinking about the 'hell' thing and the God and Goddess protect you thing being at odds with each other. Just as your comment popped in!

Great minds think alike!
just_breathe149
Jul. 16th, 2005 04:28 pm (UTC)
Great minds think alike!

But of course! :D
brigidforest
Jul. 16th, 2005 04:24 pm (UTC)
See, that's the kind of reaction about Assia you get when you hear about it ocassionally and you know nothing of it.. you think, how could she, that woman... but then as you hear more, you learn that there's so many factors involved that comments like this are stupid. That's why they should be just passing thoughts and shouldn't be voiced.

Fucking hate people like that.

For all we know, she could have had depression and then everything just spins out of control and she's all alone and so is her baby.

Fucking churchies... you know that's what she is--some bible-thumping freak.

Whoo, I'm all anger today. I need to keep my mouth shut for the rest of the day.
opheliablue
Jul. 16th, 2005 04:32 pm (UTC)
Exactly. I'm so sick of seeing her portrayed as a one-dimensional 'bit player' in Sylvia's life.

I *love* Sylvia - but even I can see past what happened with Assia to see that she herself (Assia) was seriously depressed. I don't feel some kind of need to constantly attack her.

You might be interested - there's a biography about her coming out soon. It's the first one - it was originally meant to come out at the beginning of this year, but I emailed the author a bit and she told me it's scheduled for publication in Fall of this year now. Not sure if that's still the case - but from what she said, it sounds very interesting.

It's about time someone wrote a whole biography about Assia Wevill instead of her only being referred to in relation to Sylvia. She (Assia) did actually have a whole fucking life before she even knew Ted and Sylvia.

Anger good sometimes!
brigidforest
Jul. 16th, 2005 06:27 pm (UTC)
Oh that would be a wonderful opportunity to be able to read more about her. Real life isn't a novel, so one can't just pinpoint a person down as the antithesis of the main hero (that being Sylvia). People can't seem to make the distinction sometimes. They've read too much Nora Roberts or something like that.
opheliablue
Jul. 16th, 2005 04:37 pm (UTC)
...and also, I hate it that nobody seems to take Assia's depression (which she did have) seriously (and her suicide) when they are so able to take Sylvia's depression and suicide seriously.

Excuse *me* - but if a person blames Assia in part for Sylvia's suicide, then how can they ignore the fact that at the point where Assia killed herself, Ted Hughes was having another affair and Assia knew it. So - what? It's understandable that Sylvia did it (and it's the other woman's fault) but it's not understandable that Assia did it when she found herself in a similar position?

I suppose people like that think that Assia deserved everything she got, because they partly blame her.
choirgirlpixie
Jul. 16th, 2005 09:31 pm (UTC)
I love you. So much.
freakin_sweet
Jul. 17th, 2005 10:27 am (UTC)
When have you ever been too scared to comment on someone's absurdity? Hmmm??? Scaredy-cat, my ass!

How old was Shura? It tis sad, but, like you said:

She was isolated, depressed, alone - perhaps she (in her state of mind at the time) felt 'frightened' of what might happen to Shura if she were left behind. No I am not saying that 'excuses' it. I don't think 'excusing it' comes into it. It may have been partly what was in her mind at the time, though.
opheliablue
Jul. 17th, 2005 11:56 am (UTC)
You got me. It's really because I have no intention of posting anything like that on the Forum - for my own selfish reasons. Everyone I've 'met' that was connected to Sylvia in some way has been a connection through that Forum so I just wouldn't say stuff like that there :P

Sometimes articles say Shura was 2, sometimes 4. She was 4 (as far as I am aware.)
freakin_sweet
Jul. 19th, 2005 12:47 pm (UTC)
Tis so sad, for Shura and for her mum.
( 11 comments — Leave a comment )

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